New999's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[run rabb]

I give you half a star for succeeding on making a game that was made to make you think of the bitter truth. Sadly, from what i see, it seems your message is "no one wins. everyone is a loser and so are you. so you might as well just get murdered by foxes".
I was able to "win" by getting to that chequered spot there and getting the second medal. Which would be impossible to get unless you use the cheat that gets you the first medal. Still, just because you wanted to make a game where the message is the same as putting in a level where the creator laughs at you for even touching the game, making sure you die all the time with no exit anywhere as an "instant game over" room, that doesn't mean the controls need to be worse than playing old school DOS racing games, where the turning is loose as hell when your moving but when you slow down, your turning gets so tight that when you stop moving, you cannot turn, the foxes can go anywhere at almost the same speed as you (again, without the cheat) and if you touch any of the blocks sticking out, you are going to be stuck in them with little to no luck of getting out as the foxes come jumping at you with no mercy, as your rabbit with red eyes spins around, bleeding everywhere, having one fox stay as the other one runs over your corpse like they think they're faster than you.
To be honest... the game is poor in basically everything aside from frustrating to the average gamer. I have played far harder games than this, though, so it phases me. However, what i don't get is why you would create a game, one with the message you had in mind, that is more like an anti-game than anything. Punishing the player for enjoying and trying to win a short, simple game. Giving nothing to them but just slapped on pixels, 2 character sprites and 3 levels which are basically the same, with said message. No music, no sound effects, nothing visually or physically appealing.
I guess this is what you wanted to make, a game that no one can like. Because so far, that is working. Many people in the comments hate your game to the core and the few that "like" the game are basically the ones who lie and try to make you feel good or are those typical NGers that will 5 star any game, no matter how shit it is.
So yea, again, you get HALF a star for making a successful game where you piss off the players and give them no happiness or hope in return, but that's about it. Just because you wanted to make a game to make people angry, doesn't mean you have to half ass it.

kekcsi responds:

You understand the basics of this non-game. Understanding me makes me happy. Since this is uploaded to a game portal, not being a game in any common sense, I deserve nothing but low ratings. I should have uploaded it to an "interactivity-illustrated simple message" portal, which I could not find.

[Ican'tAffordAwheelchair]

I just played your game and thought it was "lame".

Please respond to me because im an "asshole" who "hates" your "stupid" game.

Emrox responds:

Sure thing, "lunatic."

[The Classroom PSP (Demo)]

Ok for a PSP game.

But it is quite buggy, like you can go offscreen and the fact that if you touch the rays just for a second you will lose makes me quite disappoint, but this is ok for a demo. Just get rid of the bugs, get it to stop lagging on the PSP and hope this is as good as the other Classroom games.
6/10 4/5

Kwing responds:

Offscreen? I wasn't aware of that glitch.

Also I'll work on making the game a wee bit more tolerant of getting inside the beams.

[Super Switcher]

good game, bit easy

This was very good. You did a very good job on this game Zoete. Just that it was a little easy... maybe that or im actually a better player then the people below. Either way, your game was fantastic and i give you 5/5 10/10 and faved the game as well. Good job.

Zoete responds:

Well, i'm very glad to hear that. Thanks for your review and your favorite :)

[Shipwreck Survivor]

Not Bad

I would easily survive without a problem on my first try. Im not survivalist, but i watched LOST... i watched it...

anyway, 10/10 5/5 for good effort.

Lare responds:

And I'm all like "cool" and stuff.

[Touch The Bubbles 3]

Wow, just posted and now with Medals

Lucky bastards...

Well this game is pretty good. 10/10 5/5

You know what? This game deserves those medals.

GameBalance responds:

Yes we do :)

[Pyroscape]

Funny... Very funny...

This is just hilarious. Good job on the game.

2 things:
1. If you have a mouse, with the Airplane Mode thing, pick it up, put it where the clouds comes and just press that freaking mouse button like theres no tommorrow! If its laptop... your screwed.
2. I only got the Deja Vu when i pressed play a 3rd time.

Still, 10/10 5/5

Fro responds:

1) One strategy. I can get it with a single click for each. :P

2) Yeah, sorry about that.

[Escaping the Prison]

Lol. Good Job

This is really funny and good. Tad easy, but good anyway.

Awesome Job. 10/10 5/5 fav

Also, I Got The Secret Fail From The Jetpack :D

PuffballsUnited responds:

If I make another one, I'll try and make it more challenging.

[Lastman]

this... this... i got nothing for the title <:(

i just had to stop playing this game. i really have. because... well pretty much i know alot about games even NES games (and what i know is that alot of NES games suck) and, no offence, but this kinda acts like those terrible NES games only its not flicking around and its a flash game. but thats just it.

while i will give you 2 stars for effort thats all i can give you. the pixel graffics are fine. they were pretty good. and the sound effects were good too but they wont give you any stars and thats about all there is thats good about this game.

The bad thing is the rest. when you posted the walkthrough... that did not help at all. it really didnt. because: the controls were iritating. infact i couldnt figure out if i was running or jumping. infact the speed of movement when running... it didnt help with the trampoline part. sure i made it to the block, but then i couldnt see myself which means i have no idea where the hell i am til i fall and then its too late. also i have to run first then jump? it doesnt work when i press both buttons at same time? oh god...

also whats with the rockets bouncing? those are metal tiles not bouncing tiles like from the trampoline part. it make no sence. infact at the start how come one of the porcupines came down when the other stayed on the platform? what was it bored of being there and decided to move and fall to its death?

also an ad every 20 deaths? why not 5!?! *slaps hand on face and slowly brings it down* no wait thats a stupid idea. how bout never? the ads dont quiet the bitching, it just makes it worse.

finally the arrow tiles... what the bloody hell do they do?!? do they tell you where to go cause i already know where to go, right due to the fact you cant go back the way you went. infact why a left arrow if you cant go back? infact do these arrows even do anything? im already getting pissed just figuring out why those tiles are there anyway and what the hell they do!

also i jump, land on a crabs claw and die? i know the hit spot is above the crab but i die if i touch the crabs claw in the air!?! *shakes head sideways while pissed off in how bad the game is* thats just... i cant even say anything that doesnt have swearing in it after "thats just".

really i rather watch a very bad movie and replaying it from the beginning once it ends for a whole week while listening to the crappiest music ever while being stuck in a room thats impossible to escape from then play this for the next 5 hours, trying to beat it.

this game... is terrible and thats all i can say and i hope there will not be a sequal UNLESS the bad things turn good in that sequal.

now im not gonna be mean here so ill tell you some things:
1. try to make the controls a little better so it doesnt become very damn iritating
2. make sure, even if you jump on the crabs claw, that you can jump anywhere on the crab and defeat it. that way it will make sence.
3. dont put any ads on it if you die. it just makes the bitching worse.
4. the rockets... if they could bounce give em something that makes them look like they can bounce otherwise it makes the player confused on why the rocket is bouncing around when regular rockets cant bounce
5. dont make a walkthough for this game. it doesnt help. i mean it.
and finally 6. please make the arrows do something like give you an upgrade or something cause we know where we are going. if you cant do that get rid of them at least cause, again, we know where we are going.

thats about it. while this is a good idea for challenge, its pretty good even though its a pixel game and the sound effects are good, the controls were iritating, alot of thing didnt make sence and the ads after dying just bring more anger to the game.

which concludes this review with a score of 2/10 1/5

-New999

PiGPEN responds:

Feel better, champ.